Kia ora Leah-Maree, You are a very beautiful writer and I enjoyed reading this piece, I especially like your use of descriptive language from the cramped, rough concreted cell to the wilted and runny meals. I like your use of timestamps and an almost handwritten style font, my only recommendation may be adding more paragraphs to separate the writing but as it is a diary entry that is just a personal thought. Great job! Ngā mihi nui, Zana Yates Manaiakalani commenter.
Hi Zana I am so glad you like this diary entry. It took a lot of time and was quite difficult to do. I think that I will keep it as a big paragraph because I like the style more but thanks for the tip anyway.
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Kia ora Leah-Maree,
ReplyDeleteYou are a very beautiful writer and I enjoyed reading this piece, I especially like your use of descriptive language from the cramped, rough concreted cell to the wilted and runny meals. I like your use of timestamps and an almost handwritten style font, my only recommendation may be adding more paragraphs to separate the writing but as it is a diary entry that is just a personal thought. Great job!
Ngā mihi nui,
Zana Yates
Manaiakalani commenter.
Hi Zana
DeleteI am so glad you like this diary entry. It took a lot of time and was quite difficult to do. I think that I will keep it as a big paragraph because I like the style more but thanks for the tip anyway.